John Morgan Newsletter – S P A C E S

The New Year has arrived and rather than chat about RESOLUTIONS, I would like to offer some information on RECOGNITION. One must recognize a pattern of behavior or pattern of thought before one can resolve to do something about it.

As an example, let’s pretend that you don’t know that you are an immature adult but everyone else knows. You may not recognize the pattern of immaturity you are running, but it is transparent to others whether they can articulate it or not. You’ll never resolve to change the pattern unless you recognize it. Listed below are 4 signs of immaturity in an adult. If you recognize any or all of them in yourself, it will be a starting point to outgrow the old pattern and grow into a new one.

Sign 1 – A Polarity Response

Everyone has polarity responses to some degree, but immature adults have them more often than not. Everyone knows someone who seems to disagree with everything. You say, “Black” and they say “White.” That’s a strong polarity response. Polarity responses begin at about 2 years of age when a child learns the word “No.” A child figures out how to control these big creatures called adults by responding “No” to almost everything the adult wants. As we mature into adults, that response calms down quite a bit and doesn’t come out quite as often. A person whose polarity response stays at a high level into adulthood remains immature.

Sign 2 – Inability to take Responsibility for your Actions

This is ever-present in the early teens. “It’s not my fault” is the common response. There will then be a story loaded with Swiss cheese facts such as: “All the kids are flunking Algebra.” “The teacher doesn’t like me.” When this continues into adulthood, you have a person who continues to point outward at anyone but themselves, absolving themselves of any personal responsibility. The phrase, “You made me do that” is a constant in their vocabulary. This is common in drug and alcohol dependant people as well as abusers of all sorts. People who are angry most of the time are fanatical about pointing the finger of blame at someone else.

Sign 3 – Inability to Apologize

Some people can go their whole life without apologizing. These are very immature people. “Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word” is more than an Elton John song. It is a reality for many adults. And I’m not referring to an apology that comes from protocol – meaning it’s the right thing to do or it will get people off your back. The apology I refer to comes with heartfelt feelings for the person you are apologizing to. If you’ve never done anything you need to apologize for, you wouldn’t have read this far. You would have had some thought like, “This doesn’t apply to me.” Heartfelt apologies are healing and they begin to breakdown this immaturity pattern that many adults never outgrow. It’s therapeutic for both the giver and receiver of the apology.

Sign 4 – Being Upset with Everyone when You’re Upset.

Immature people don’t recognize that there are innocent bystanders – people who have nothing to do with your upsetness but have to pay the price for your immaturity. Let’s say you are in customer service and you just had an interaction with a very difficult, obstinate and abusive customer, you would be less than human if that did not color your interactions with the next person you encounter. But if you don’t “flap your wings” and shake it off like a duck that just had a combative interaction with another duck, you will have the same hostility for the next person who doesn’t deserve your wrath. Having a bad day at work may not make you a happy camper when you get home, but please recognize that the members of your household had nothing to do with your bad day.

Again, RECOGNITION of a pattern, especially when you are running it, means you are at the threshold of change. Recognition is the wedge between stimulus and response. Recognition is the first step to making any change.

So I hope this will help you with your New Year Recognitions so that any resolutions have a prayer of being achieved.

Please visit my website http://JohnMorganHypnosis.com and see if any of our DVDs or CDs make sense for something you want to accomplish in the New Year!

Health, Happiness, Peace, and above all, S P A C E S between your thoughts.

Happy New Year!
John Morgan